It is the end of what felt like a very short week of mission in Tuskegee, AL. I know I am not alone when I say that my mind and body are exhausted. Early mornings and long days in the Alabama sun have taken their toll on me and the Wesley community, but I am glad to say that my spirit is renewed by the ways that God worked through this week.
As I reflect on our week in Tuskegee, my mind lingers on a question posed Friday night.
When asked this question in small groups, our answers could not have been more different. One member had a detailed plan for what their calling in life was, and how they would use that calling to change the world. Another member had no idea. Others were left quiet with the magnitude of the question.
Frankly, I have absolutely no clue what is next. I am terrible at discerning what God wants for me. I fumble around my life hoping that I will find this ‘path’ that I hear mentioned so often. But I trust Him. I trust that regardless of what is next, God has prepared it for His glory.
I do know what I want to be next. I know that I want to see a Wesley community renewed in their faith and so spiritually invigorated from a week being the hands and feet of Christ that our campus will overflow with the love of God through their being. I know that I want to see relationships with people deeply rooted in Christ, overcoming the chains of the spiritual poverty we saw this week. I want to hear friends asking friends not just “How was your day?” but “How is your heart? How is your soul?”.
But for now, I wait.
A dear friend of mine taught me about waiting in “expectationless expectancy.” It took me quite a while to grasp this idea, but when asked “What’s next?”, I finally understand. To wait in expectationless expectancy is to trust that God will provide, but to not cling to what it is He is providing. To trust that God has a plan, but with no expectations about the details. I wait, expecting that God will give us the avenue for what is next. After this week, I trust that God will challenge us to create what is next. And I challenge every one of you to wait and listen for the call.
It may not come as a neon sign with an arrow saying “THIS IS WHAT IS NEXT GO THIS WAY.” But I do know what it might look like. It might look like a conversation with a man you don’t speak with often. It might look like kind words to someone who is in need. It might be you throwing a ball with someone who really needs a friend. It might be offering food to someone you walk by everyday. It might even just be a hug.
It can be many things. But it is a step to what is next. And if it is really what is next, it is God.
After this week, I rest my body and mind to prepare for what might be next, and remain thankful for the opportunity to serve others and the Lord.